Living with the death
by G. VOULGARIDIS
(GLASGOW, SCOTLAND UK)
IT ALL STARTED 10 YEARS AGO AFTER I TRIED TO START A BUSINESS. I TRIED VERY HARD TO MAKE IT SUCCESSFUL. IT WAS A GOOD SIZE RESTAURANT, AND I TRIED MY BEST, WORKING DAY AND NIGHT.
AFTER 8 MONTHS WORKING 12 TO14 HOURS I HAD A NERVOUS BREAK DOWN. I’VE BEEN TO A DOCTOR ASKED HIM SOME HELP. SUFFERED FROM INSOMNIA DESPERATELY NEEDED TO SLEEP .
I WAS PRESCRIBED 2 DRUGS (STILNOX 10 mg and xanax 0,5mg).TO MAKE IT CLEAR, I HAVE BEEN ALWAYS FIT AND I’VE DONE GRECO ROMAN WRESTLING WHEN TEENAGER. BUT SLOWLY BECAME AN ADDICT. SEEMED TO BE THAT THE DOSAGE I WAS TAKING. DID NOT WORK SO I STARTED TO INCREASE THE DOSAGE. IN THE MEAN TIME STARTED TO DRINK, SO THOROUGH THE YEARS STARTED TO MAKE MY OWN COCKTAIL(DRUGS AND ALCOHOL)5-6 YEARS LATER STARTED TO LOOSE CONTROL OF THE SITUATION.
USED ALWAYS DRUGS PRESCRIBED MY DOCTOR. TO GIVE AN IDEA I WAS TAKEN 2 MONTHS SUPPLIES, CONSUMED WITHIN 2 WEEKS WAS A LONELY BATTLE. DAY BECAME NIGHT AND NIGHT BECAME DAY. SLEEPING ALL DAY AND A OPERATING FEW HOURS.
CONSEQUENTLY LOST CONTROL OF MY BUSINESS, PEOPLE STARTED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE, TILL I WAS TRAPPED IN A DARK WEB , LOST INTEREST IN LIFE.
BUT I COULD NOT REALIZE THE DAMAGE I HAVE DONE TO MY BODY TILL ONE DAY SOME FRIENDS, GAVE ME SOME PICTURES FROM A CHRISTENING I WAS GOD FATHER TO FRIENDS LITTLE GIRL.
WHEN I SAW THE PICTURES I COULDN'T RECOGNIZE THE PERSON I WAS. ONLY 48 AND LOOKED LIKE 70 ALSO FELT LIKE 70. I MADE A MASSIVE EFFORT TO REHAB MY SELF. I MANAGED AND LOST SOME 25 KC TRAINING, STARTED TO LIVE AGAIN THAT WAS MY LAST AWAKENING.
AFTER SOME TIME STARTED TO DRUG AGAIN 4-5 BOTTLES WINE DAILY TAKING A LOT OF PRESCRIBED DRUGS SUPPLIES FOR 7 MONTHS I TOOK THEM WITHIN 15 DAYS. STARTING TO FEEL MY LIFE IS GOING TO END.
DID KNOW WHAT WAS HAPPENING. AT THE END OF MAY I COLLAPSED. FOUND MY SELF IN A PSYCHIATRIC WARD. I WAS LOST THE HOLE SUMMER 2011 PASSED WITHOUT REALISING WHERE I WAS. STARTED TO RECOVER, GET BACK TO THE REAL WORLD.
STARTED TO RECOVER GATHERING MY PIECES OF MY LIFE, THANKS TO THE SUPPORT I HAD FROM THE TEAM OF THE DOCTORS AND NURSES, HAVE NOT HAD A GLASS OF ALCOHOL, OR ANY DRUGS. HAVE NOT BEEN DISCHARGED FROM HOSPITAL YET ... LOST BUSINESS BUT THANKS TO GOD -BUDHA AND ANY OTHER DIVINE POWERS WORKED THAT DAY THAT I CHEATED DEATH…
