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You can beat it...

by Jerry
(Tulsa,Ok)

You can do it. I'm 5 months clean and enjoying my life. Spent two and a half months in the hospital getting rid of that bacterial infection that almost killed me. Good still and everyday struggle not to relapse but I'm fighting harder and harder everyday.

Because I refuse to allow addiction to control my life anymore. I never thought that I would be able to do it because I have tried so many times and have failed. But as they say no addict is going to quit unless they are ready themselves regardless of what anybody else says. I mean this time around I am truly done. Well over 30 years in active addiction the hell the misery ruined marriages. And life just seems meaningless because all I worried about everyday all day long it's how I'm going to get that next hit am I going to be able to get high today and if I don't the feeling like shit day in and day out..

I'll be 45 years old this may and I cannot even sit here and begin to reflect a remember a lot of my life. My youngest child is 16 and I cannot even remember half of her life things have gone on because I was too busy chasing drugs instead of spending the quality time with my children.

There's a lot that I regret from being a drug addict. Bring a drug addict you don't realize how much of your life you're wasting away. And I got a felony record no driver's license haven't seen two of my sons since they were little kids and they're both grown now. It's hard to find a job having a felony and no driver's license, a lot of people do not believe in second chances they don't believe that people can change. And I truly believe that the people that think that have never been through any kind of turmoil in their life. I mean I try so hard to make things right to get things going again like they're supposed to and yet I keep getting slapped in the face because of my drug addiction and my felony record.

I can't find a job if everybody wants to do a background check want you to have a valid driver's license. I know it's going to be a long road but I will get my life back together!

Comments for You can beat it...

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Good to hear from you again :)
by: Debbie Wicker

Hi Jerry,

Sounds like you've really been working hard to stay sober. Congratulations on the progress you've made and please accept my encouragement to continue up this difficult climb of sobriety. As you've so elegantly described, it's a challenging road but one that is well worth the struggle.

Also, may I suggest that you not be too hard on yourself for your past mistakes. We are given each day as a new day to make better choices and to move toward where we'd like to be in our lives and away from the previous missteps.

Congratulations again and please continue to keep us posted on your progress. We truly appreciate and benefit from your invaluable insights.

Debbie

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