Is it an addiction?
by Rachel
(Missouri)
I am 19 and have been doing drugs here and there since I was thirteen. Then when I turned 17, I was introduced to pain-killers and started to take them occasionally too. Then it became weekly.
I still don’t use everyday, but I do take painkillers at least three times a week if not more, sometimes less. When I am off for two days or so I cannot stop thinking about getting high again but then the day after I take them I feel so guilty that I won’t quit.
I have “tried” but I feel like I keep putting little effort into it. After all if no one knows and then it must not be a problem. If they can’t see a difference in me then its not affecting me. That’s how I see it sometimes.
I’m so conflicted with myself because I want to, want to quit but when it gets down to the niddy griddy of it I don’t think I’m addicted so I just keep using. Basically I think you have to use everyday to be an addict and I don’t use everyday just a couple times a week but I still feel like I can stop if I try but it’s like I can’t make myself try to stop even though after every time I use I say its my last time.
Basically my question is where is the line drawn between recreational use and addiction or dependence?
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Fuzzy Line
First of all, a substance use disorder (addiction) is characterized by the inability of the user to stop. It is a brain disorder that causes a person to use, even though they know they are doing harm to themselves. It is not so much the amount, or the frequency, but the behavior attached to it all. I would recommend a doctor’s visit and an assessment. Be honest and open about your drug use. I am confident there are treatment programs that will work very well for you, so as long as you are concerned and thinking about it, why not address the problem now before it rips you apart and ruins your life? You will be glad to handled it. There’s so much life ahead for you. |