Lost in denial


I would enjoy sharing my story with many teenagers that believe the can balance the life of drugs and success. I am 17 years old, I have know my best friend who is 17 years old since we were in kindergarten. We have been best friends our whole lives, their isn't anything I couldn't tell him or trust him with.

When I was 15 I smoked pot with my friends one night, I didn't get high. 2 weeks earlier Connor smoked with his friends as well. 2 weeks after I smoked, I had the opportunity to buy weed again and Connor and I decided to do it together.

We smoked for the first time together and it was unlike anything in the world, it was the best feeling I've ever encountered in my life. Everything was perfect. Me and Connor started smoking tiny amounts every once in a while. That was winter, when spring came we started using A LOT. We were constantly high but having a great time.

When summer came I fell in love with him, and he had always been in love with me so I decided to risk our friendship and date to try it out. We still continued to smoke and we wanted to wait to have sex for a while into our relationship to not rush things. I had sex with Connor only 15 days after dating because we were both high and out of our minds. High sex is another amazing feeling and we continued to have high sex and smoke constantly.

We were very successful and careful people who have never got caught by police or our parents. We had amazing grades and we thought life was perfect.

4 months into our relationship we started arguing a lot, about things we couldn't even remember because we were so high. We started doing hard pills and just tripping out together.

After 7 1/2 amazing months we decided we couldn't date anymore, we had to quit drugs because of drug tests and we realized how much it was really effecting us. We were careless to each other because weed makes you care less. Leaving Connor was probably the hardest experience in my whole life and it's something I can never change.

We always loved each other but we were in denial that we loved drugs more. Connor and I still remain very good friends and are sober, however I just wanted to explain to people that you might think you can balance out your life with drugs but in the end it takes something away from you that you never imagine would.

I never imagined loosing Connor as my boyfriend and I let him slip away because I was addicted. I NOW admit I had a serious problem and I wish I could do anything to change it. However it's too late. I lost someone I love dearly and I never saw it coming. I was successful, happy, pleased, and my life was great.

Weed and other drugs will change you no matter who you are and I just want whoever to read this and understand YOU ARE NOT DIFFERENT. It will take over you and you won't realize once it's too late. If you must use, please do with tiny amounts forever. Never think you need to up your amount.

Thank you for listening and I hope I have changed your mind about smoking 6 blunts this weekend. You don't want to realize you have a problem when it's taken something so important you you.

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