My boyfriend is addicted to cocaine?
by kim
(canada)
My boyfriend is addicted to cocaine. We have been together for almost a year and he never used to do it as much as he does now. It went from one day on the weekend to 4-5 times a week.
I threatened to leave him and he said he would stop. He did stop for a couple weeks and then started again. He is back to doing it 4-5 times a week. He tells me that it is my fault because I make him so miserable for bitching at him about doing it so much.
He has become verbally abusive and always in my face, putting me down telling me “good luck finding someone better” when I threaten to leave. He has changed so much, its almost like I don’t know who he is anymore.
He tells me I don’t make enough money to tell him how to spend his money and he will buy how ever much he wants when he wants. When he never even has enough money to buy it & just fronts it off of people.
When he isn’t doing cocaine he is the best, loving boyfriend I could want. I love him to much to leave, but I am so unhappy most the time. Someone help me.
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How will your future be?
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some thoughts…..
Not sure how he affords it…but its always there and in large amounts. Now, as a girl who knew better, I stayed in this roller coaster relationship far too long. I have lost friends, self respect, time with family, and sanity with my use of this drug with him. Glad to know he didn’t pull you in too! There has been horrible fights late at night, he has cheated on me many times, lies, suspicions, accusations….he is the most jealous and controlling person….I blame this partly on the drug. He can be the sweetest man and then turn into a paranoid, suspicious nut case. I have finally realized that it is not fun any more. I want to stop the coke and I can….I don’t feel like I need it or even want it. I have been thinking a lot lately about why it has been so hard to get out of this relationship and I have come to the conclusion that I don’t really know if I am really in love with or addicted to him….or am I addicted to his drug and stay with him so I can get it. I feel certain I am not staying with him for this reason, but it’s making me wonder lately. My advice to you is….if you love him and you aren’t using…then try going to Al-anon…or the equivalent for narcotics anonymous. Give this a try and see what you learn and how you feel. Just don’t wast too much time thinking he will change because remember the person has to want to change in order to change. I am doing as suggested above and dropping him gently…..as I care for him, but he will never change and he tells me this….so I must get out before something really bad happens. |