My son is on crack an robbing everyone?

by Cryssy

(Pennsauken NJ)

I have a 25 year old son on pcp and more recently crack I put him out but its cold now so I let him stay in the basement.

I lock everything up but he finds things to steal anyway so I had to put him out again. He is living in a house with no heat roaming the street. I hurt for him and don’t know what to do. Hell, I’m starting to feel a little crazy myself what should I do?

Force the Issue

by: Ned Wicker

Dear Cryssy,

Fool me once, shame on you…fool me twice, shame on me. You are learning that the diseased mind does not allow for reason, compassion, respect, appreciation or any other characteristic or behavior that well-adjusted adults display routinely.

You son can’t help himself and left to his own devices will likely kill himself eventually. However, as you have found out, you can’t have him living with you because he will rob you blind and leave nothing behind just to feed his disease.

You can only take cared of your own business and you can’t force him to do anything, even save himself.

You need support, so a call to Al-anon is a good idea for you. So many parents struggle with what to do for their sons and daughters. You have a difficult situation, because other than throwing him out, you have no control over your son and he is certainly not going to allow you to express any desires and opinions that are against him using.

Al-anon’s members have been through this struggle and they understand your experience.

Sometime addicts refuse any help, regardless of their wretched condition. You have the problem, not them. They can handle it. They know what’s best. You know from experience that your son is out of control, so you have to find a way to stop him before it’s too late.

You can try to gather the family together, under the direction of a trained professional, and have an intervention. It doesn’t always come down the way you see it on television.

You may also consider having him arrested and placed in a court-ordered drug treatment program, which he will fight against. In any event, you need to create a situation that forces him to understand that there are consequences to his behavior. He has to want to change and want to get help.

Your son has a brain disease. Nobody wants to be an addict, but he made some bad choices and it happened. Yes, it may be self-inflicted, but that does not diminish the fact that he needs treatment.

By hook or crook, you need to find a way to get him some help. Call Al-anon.

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