Snorting Heroin and crack?
by Jim
I have a friend that is addicted to Heroin (snorting) and crack. She has been addicted for many years and her existence is dominated by her drug use.
My question is this;
Am I enabling her by giving her money to buy drugs?
I am tempted to quit giving her money, but I know she will do whatever is necessary to get her drugs. This may bring even worse consequences such as jail.
Just looking for advice…..
Thanks
|
Stand Firm
I echo Lynette’s suggestion on Al-Anon. You have to get your mind focused on the end goal of getting your friend clean and healthy. Giving her money is the worst thing you can do, even though you want to help her and want to be her friend. You have to prepare yourself to fight the good fight, to be an advocate for her without enabling the addiction, to care for her without giving in to her addictive desires, to be strong enough to say no and state firmly and clearly what you expect her to do. Take care of yourself and don’t let her addiction suck the life out of you. Lynette, thanks for your thoughtful responses, they are very encouraging and useful. I will pray for you, your son and your family. |
|
Snorting Heroin and Crack
Thanks for writing. I am a recovering alcoholic – I have not drank for 25 years. My son is an addict and has been for 13 years. I think he’s finally sick of it all but time will tell. Anyhow, I, personally, think that you are enabling your friend by giving her money for drugs. You think she may do worse things to get the drugs, but what about if she overdosed – and God forbid – died. Wouldn’t you feel you were partly responsible? My brother in law died of a heroin overdose at 32 years old – it was completely heartbreaking for us. I would strongly recommend that you talk to a drug and alcohol counselor, a medical doctor or a clergy to get help as to what to do. Don’t try to figure it out on your own. That’s what I did for many years with my son and I enabled him to the MAX. Now I am finally realizing that he never really wanted to quit because when he got out of the rehabs. and out of jail he’d go right back to using. The decision to quit has to be your friend’s. I also HIGHLY recommend that you go to an Al Anon meeting (they talk about drugs, too). There you will meet others in the same or similar situation as yourself. I have learned so much from the meetings and have met some great, great people. I hope that I have helped you in some way. I hope it did not seem like I was putting you down in any way. I know what it is like to want to try to help someone you love but I finally learned and accepted that sometimes by “helping” them I was just actually helping them to keep using. Good luck and I will pray for you and your friend-Lynette
|