by: Ned Wicker

Dear James,

Very important question. When men come out of detention it is so very difficult for them to follow all of the demands that the system places on their shoulders, from seeking employment to checking in with their parole officer. A few years ago the Wisconsin Chaplaincy Association was invited to participate in a demonstration put on by the Department of Corrections.

We had to complete necessary tasks in a time frame and found out quickly that the deck was stacked against us. It was frustrating.

Hopefully he was given drug treatment in prison. Otherwise he was just not using. He is still going to use again. If he did not receive treatment, encourage him to get into a treatment program and establish a new way of living. He needs to be in a recovery program to get support in his new life.

He has to avoid going to the old haunts and seeing the old crowd, to places where he used to go to score and get into trouble. Recovery is a life-long activity and he has to want to change his lifestyle and be healthy. Encourage him to go to meetings and encourage him to help others.

Have him explain to you what the authorities demand of him when he gets out. You can help him fulfill his obligations by providing a ride or helping him along. As for his Substance Use Disorder, you can call Al-anon and get with their members, who are parents just like you who have struggled with how to help their sons.

If he has not had treatment, you might want to begin researching that area of concern by speaking with your family doctor, or a local hospital or treatment center. You need to know what he needs to do, what he needs to have in place and where he needs to go.