“GETTING THEM SOBER e-BOOK”

1.)) THE 350 SECONDARY DISEASES FROM ALCOHOLISM2.)) THE HIDDEN PROBLEMS WHEN SEPARATED FROM // DIVORCING AN ALCOHOLIC3.)) WHAT KEEPS US SO EMOTIONALLY ATTACHED TO ALCOHOLICS??!!4.)) SEX & TRUST ISSUES WHEN INVOLVED WITH AN ALCOHOLIC5.)) YOUR CHILD—— IS IT ALCOHOLISM?! —— & EXACTLY WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT, IF IT IS

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THE CHAPTER TITLES IN THE ”GETTING THEM SOBER” BOOK —No more taking the blame for someone else’s drinking!Be gentle with yourselfDon’t worry about whether he’s really an alcoholicDon’t pour out the boozeLearn to relaxDon’t be afraid of losing him because you’re changingStop arguing with him (it works!)Do one thing every day just for yourselfUse tough loveDon’t ride with him when he’s drunkConfront him!Walk away from abuseAccept yourselfDon’t believe “Drunk Is Fun!”Tell your families? Only if you want to!Mean what you say and say what you meanDeal with his arrogance!Don’t change your address!Hide the car keys?You have the right to get sick too!Learn about blackoutsTry to remember it’s a diseaseLet the crises happenNo more lying to his boss!Start to get help—- Even though he’s the alcoholicStay with him or leave him “Just for today”Break out of your isolationStop asking permission!Act as if you love youPut him in the back of your mindDon’t feel guilty when you’re mad!Forget his bad mouthDon’t say you’re changing—–just do itDon’t get scared when he threatens to drinkStop telling him how to get sober (don’t talk to brick walls, either)Wipe out saying, “you’ve been drinking again!”Stop checking the barsDon’t expect him to be soberDon’t beg him to stayDon’t be scared that he will leave if he gets wellSex and alcoholismGetting HelpA Quick Test— Are you an alcoholic?1.)) THE 350 SECONDARY DISEASES FROM ALCOHOLISM2.)) THE HIDDEN PROBLEMS WHEN SEPARATED FROM // DIVORCING AN ALCOHOLICRemember the facts!It’s YOUR decision whether or not to separate—- it’s not your counselor’s decisionCourage to change the things we can”I was able to decide to leave, even though he was sober and I was physically ill”What are examples of crazymaking that counselors should inherently know in order for us to trust their advice-giving?”How counseling helped me decide””But he looks so good since we’re separated. Maybe he’s not an alcoholic?””But he’s drinking less since we’re separated. Can he be getting better?””I can’t stop being angry with him!””When I see my alcoholic husband and he’s nice to me, I get upset!””I can’t forgive him””My denial, my compassion, and my guilt pulled me down into it with him, again””I’ve dropped the divorce proceedings six times, now””I feel guilty because I think I didn’t do enough to make him want to be sober””I left a sober alcoholic””If I give up obsession, do I have to give up hope?””How can I help him after we’re separated?”What are the real problems about dating again?Answering your legal questions about alcoholism, divorce, children, and court-ordered evaluationsIntervention3.)) WHAT KEEPS US SO EMOTIONALLY ATTACHED TO ALCOHOLICS??!!Don’t try to make sense out of their nonsenseKnowing that it’s hard to lose an alcoholic, helps us to calm down and keep us on the recovery pathThe irregular behavior of the alcoholic keeps us attachedThe alcoholic does not exist separately from the alcoholismExcited misery keeps us attached to the alcoholicOur need to caretake keeps us attached to the alcoholicFacing our illusions ends their power to hurt usQuick ways to detach4.)) SEX & TRUST ISSUES WHEN INVOLVED WITH AN ALCOHOLICSex and “games” and recoveryAdult children of alcoholics— guilt, shame, abuse, and isolationAdult daughters of alcoholics and the mistress-compulsionReplacing the excitement of sicknessAIDS: Families of alcoholics — hidden-high-risk group?Notes to family counselors and their clients5.)) YOUR CHILD– IS IT ALCOHOLISM?! — & EXACTLY WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT, IF IT ISIs it “just a phase”Parents are not guilty—the genetic facts about alcoholismWhy most therapies haven’t been able to helpSuicide, therapy, and other teen issues: young A.A. members anonymously tell their storiesInterventionTough love is too tough for most of us with our children—- how professionals can help do the intervention for youIf your child is also mentally-illCaught in the middle—–when adult children of alcoholics are also parents of alcoholic childrenAlcoholic ‘games’—-when your alcoholic ex-spouse adds to your troublesSurrounded by alcoholism—- if your spouse AND children are alcoholic

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If your loved one is struggling with addiction and you are feeling helpless, contacting your nearest alcohol treatment center is another great place to start.