by: Ned Wicker

Dear Pam,

I agree with your friends. She is an adult know, but you treat her like a child. She runs the house. She curses at you and flips you the finger, having no respect for you whatsoever. There are no consequences to her behavior. You feed her, clothe her, house her and you get contempt and disrespect as payment.

Addicts will lie to your face, because it’s a part of the disease. All she is focused on is getting high. Her life is out of control and you are funding it. It’s time to draw a line in the sand and stop the lunacy. It’s hard for parents to do this because they tried their best to give their child a proper upbringing and provide for them. That does not include getting punched in the face.

You have to have some rules and boundaries in your house, but it’s obvious she has no respect, so it’s time she be given the opportunity to discover the harsh reality her lifestyle will bring. You can try to lay down the law, but you probably will violate your own rules because she’ll wear you down.

As it stands now, you are a prisoner in your own house. That person living with you who used to be your daughter, needs help desperately. Therefore, you need a plan to get her into treatment and hopefully get her life back on track.

Saying “no” is not an option. She either goes to treatment, or she leaves your house. But before you act, consult a treatment center, talk to the folks at Al-anon, maybe get some counsel from local law enforcement. The police can be a tremendous help, especially if you need to force the issue and get her into treatment. Get the rest of the family in on this and formulate a plan, then follow it.

Her behavior has to stop now. You have few options. Sometimes in life a kick in the backside is far more loving than turning the other cheek. Your girl is in serious trouble. Be strong.

by: Nicholas

I know it’s a very hard decision but I think that you should try to gain trust from her because she is an addict and you know that it is a disease.

To overcome that disease take her to some good rehab center and give the proper love and care and I am sure she will be all right soon.

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by: Lex

I have not been addicted to drugs through recreational use, but through prescriptions. Opiate addiction is a very hard battle.. just as other drug addictions are such as cocaine, alcohol, et cetera.

I’m only 19 years old. I have been on pain medicine for almost two years. But, I never “rebelled” from my parents rules. I am not the type to go partying and leave responsibility.

Though I’ve battled addiction for so long- and I’m STILL battling addiction.. I made Dean’s list at my college, and I’m always focused when it comes to my goals. I personally think, coming from a “child’s” perspective.. as a “teen” and knowing my parents worry about my well-being- just as you care for your daughter’s well-being. It isn’t just one big list that can be fixed in one day.. it takes months, years.. to heal.

First.. I suggest showing that you’re on her side- not against her. But you are doing the right thing by setting rules down. I would try to set her up with a program to be treated for her addiction.

I have only had my mother to help me through this. It is such an embarrassing thing to be labeled as an “addict”..so it’s not something that I go around telling my friends.

I personally cannot trust others with my problems- so I thank God that I have my Mother to be there for me. I think you should try your hardest to show her you support her.. but show her the effects of the aftermath… what can happen… everything.

Show her statistics… scare her.. because the truth is the most scary damned thing to be faced with. And that is why it is so hard for her to face what she is going through. I feel that in this situation.. she feels the need for attention.. something to fill a void she has in her life..

Best of luck.. just try to understand. If someone has never been through addiction- they cannot even begin to understand the pain and constant battle that occurs.