Friend Trying To Stop
Hey… I’ve got a friend well he was my boyfriend before he started to do drugs …
He’s told me like 3 times I’m stopping …
I won’t smoke anymore …
I’m trough …
But he never stops and yesterday he told me he stopped …
Now I wanna support him but I dont wanna like get my hopes up …
Maybe he didn’t even stop I dont know what to think anymore …
A lot of people gave up on him but I can’t …
He says he started to smoke because of me (when I left him) and he was the anti-drug guy …
BEFORE…
I want the old him back …
Is there still hope??
Is it realy my fault am I the one to blame for all this??
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Where Did My Friend Go?
I don’t blame you for wanting the old guy back. Addiction just robs people of their values, their humanity and their vitality. As long as he is using, there is no room for a meaningful relationship, but I respect the fact that you don’t want to let go. You can be a friend. I have a couple of thoughts. Joe Herzanek’s book, “Why Don’t They Just Quit?” is filled with answers that people just like you ask every day. Joe is a jail chaplain and has spent years ministering to people just like your boyfriend. He has gone through the gauntlet of addiction, so he knows how people think and why they do what they do. You can get the book on Amazon, or http://whydonttheyjustquit.com and there is even a link on this website. Also, your local Al-Anon chapter might help you formulate a game plan and assist you in dealing with your friend. Before he is worthy of you, and I do hope you are worthy of being worthy, he must first take care of himself, own up to his addiction and be a man. Anything short of that, anything short of his receiving treatment and going into a good recovery program, is only going to hurt you in the end if you don’t draw a line in the sand and set a good standard for yourself. There is hope. Maybe that old friend of yours might show up again. If he doesn’t, you probably need to move on. |