My life without a childhood

by Dana
(Surrey, UK)

My life,

I grew up seeing a lot of things no child should ever see.. I was in and out of foster care since I was young and I have lost a lot of friends to suicide... I've seen people close to me get killed and I started feeling hurt and confused why I was brought into my family and then to be left alone.  Robbed from my childhood... no child should ever go through what I did. 

All I did was beg for my family's approval and to be loved from them.  Mostly i wanted my dad to love me... but no response or they have a weird way of showing it.  But I don't blame that. 

People only repeat what their taught.. so I started doing every drug except heroin.  I was in and out of jail.  I always think about what my uncle used to say to me.  He said I deserve better and family is what you make it. 

My family used to try and push me to quit.  But the more I didn't... so they finally stopped asking me and when my uncle was murdered I felt empty and didn't want to go on, but he wouldn't of wanted that. 

So I left town and cleaned up I had 3 beautiful children and went back to school... I thought I was in love by my kids dad but was obviously not.  He was in and out of jail and I thought to myself why am I putting myself through this?  I didn't change my life around to be with a jail bird. 

I was raising my children on my own.. I toughed it out for 8 years but couldn't take it anymore so I left him. It's a good thing cause I wouldn't of went back to school.  Every thing was going good and then my kids dad put a lock of my children and I'm not allowed to leave lower mainland.  He used my past against me.  I asked him for breaks but didn't get any... my son had behavioral issues.. I could handle him.  It's babysitter, school and daycare couldn't. 

I was getting frustrated so I asked the ministry if they could get him a support worker so I don't lose my job.  They said only if I sign them to care.  I wasn't going to do that.  My son started biting his sister.  The school saw the bite marks and called the ministry.  I then lost my children.. and worker called my work and got me fired.. on top of it. It was my uncle's 9 year anniversary. 

I then couldn't take it.  Felt all alone I worked hard to change my life for it to be taken from me.. I am a good mother and don't deserve this. 

So I started drinking and caught myself before it's too late.. I am busting my ass to get my children back.  The reason I am writing this out is to show everyone that has had a rough life that you can change.  Trust me.  I was clean for 9 years...  just move away from it and get positive friends... family doesn't have to  be blood.  You can do it.. I believe in you

Click here to post comments

Do you have a question or story? It's easy to ask your question or submit your story. How? Simply click here to return to Alcoholism Causes.

and Finally Remember:

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."
- Matthew 7:7-8


Subscribe to our Drug-Addiction-Support.org weekly email:

Recent Articles

  1. Resources for Making Life Easier

    Sep 27, 19 09:34 AM

    Life's challenges are hard, no matter who you are or what you're facing. Whether it's everyday struggles you're working to overcome like setting up and

    Read More

  2. Overcoming Common Stigmas of Mental Illness

    Sep 16, 19 10:01 AM

    There are millions of Americans suffering from some form of mental illness. Yet, the number of people that actually get help for their condition pales

    Read More

  3. Where?

    Sep 09, 19 09:46 AM

    Is there any Al-anon meetings in Saint Francis Kansas? If so where??

    Read More

Follow us on Twitter #AddictionSuport