What do I recommend?

by Trish

To whom it may concern,

I am a mentor for a Christian ministry, you see. One of my mentee’s is about 21, yet has many things wrong with her, especially one where she was told by a doctor that her mentality is of a 16 year old and will stay there. Which i believe was totally wrong of that dr to say that. Because only God knows, he is the on in full control of her mind.

Anyway she is in the midst of taking care of her mom who is on every drug, and pain killer you can think of. They don’t have money or insurance to pay for a rehab. However this mother will steel the money that she gets from i guess good samaritans, and probably family members, who of one has sexually molested her when she was younger.

Anyway my question is. Can you suggest anything for her that i can tell her. Also her pastor wanted her to move into this home for battered women but she had refused cause number one she is afraid to leave her mom, number 2 she has a dog and it’s bigger than the housing will allow. She keeps saying that if anything happened to her mom she doesn’t know what she will do.

She is literally going through a living hell just trying to take care of her mom so she doesn’t shoot herself, or doesn’t burn the house done trying to fix a meal. And also just food for thought this mother has done this her entire life growing up and all. I keep telling her that God has a reason why she was not killed all the times that her mother had thrown her out to live on the streets, when she was 16. I mean there has to be someway without a lot of money to get her into some program i mean i just don’t know what to suggest to her anymore besides prayer, which i don’t know about her but i am constantly praying for her.

This girl literally keeps saying how she hates her life, and who can actually blame her. But then on the flip side i don’t think she would know what to do with herself whether she would actually consider working on herself with God to mend her life.

I am really nervous as to if something happens to her mom… if she finds her dead one of these days, i can honestly say i don’t know what she would do.

Please if you have any suggestions i am opened for suggestions.

May God bless

Trish

We are all individuals

by: Ned Wicker


Dear Trish,

The mother/daughter relationship you are describing is rather disturbing. I am getting the impression that if mom is ok, the daughter will allow herself to be helped. Is that correct? Child abuse is a strange and profoundly sad occurrence.

It seems the mother’s abuse of the daughter has created this sick bond between the two, as if the daughter has lost herself and is attached to her mother and the dysfunction. Neither is doing each other any favors. The daughter has to find herself and be per own person.

The Christian message is so positive and productive, as once she understands how God sees her, she can begin to heal and fulfill her life. Mom needs professional help, it sounds like, and so you have to find a way to satisfy the daughter’s misdirected loyalty. God has the answer for both of them.


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