Drug Addiction Family
Drug Addiction Family:
What are the effects of addiction on the family?
One of the saddest aspects of the insidious nature of drug addiction is that by the time an addict realizes he/she has a problem, that problem has already taken a heavy toll on the family. Drug addiction family impact is immeasurable but at the same time very subtle.
"I want my kid back!"
Parents in treatment centers tell counselors and therapists that they want to “get their kids back,” as drug addiction has taken over to the point where the courts have been forced to remove the children from the home.
Husbands and wives, brothers and sisters, and sadly children are all impacted. Families can be sources of strength and support, or they can passively enable the addiction to advance.
Families can share in the victory over drug addiction, or they can be the victims of it.
How do I talk to them to get them to stop using?
There is no sense in arguing with an addict. Why? You don’t want to argue because you are wrong. You have been wrong, you are wrong and you will always be wrong. Only the addict is right. Against hundreds of reasonable, rational and correctly-formed opinions, the addict firmly believes he/she is right and the rest of you are wrong.
Drug Addiction Family
The hard part is separating your love of the person from what is in their best interest. People become enablers. We feel sorry for them, or don’t want to hurt them, or we just don’t want to face the problem head on and deal with it.
The husband goes into his workshop to drink, and rather than having a fight, the wife allows it. Maybe the husband has given up because he does not believe there is anything he can do to stop his wife from using.
Sometimes a mere loving suggestion is helpful. But as the abuse of a substance grows into addiction, your loving suggestion is meaningless. You’ve heard of “tough love,” and that’s just what is needed. Depending on your situation, rather than going through the pain of endless arguments over their using, go to an interventionist and get help. That person is a professional and trained to implement the best strategy. In other words, don’t be a hero. Let the interventionist be your coach.
By allowing an independent third party into your situation, you are giving yourself an opportunity to take a step back, while still doing the right thing and being a helpful part of the scenario. People go months, years without ever knowing what to do. Meanwhile the addict continues. Do they care what you think? Do they make sense to you? You need a plan and the interventionist is the first step.
You may be asked to do something you really don’t want to do, such as allowing “tough love” to take its course. Again, be “coachable.” When the therapist lays out the plan, allow that plan to unfold without interference. You will be allowed to give your input and ask questions.
Remember this-- if the addict does not allow anyone to help, if the addict refuses treatment and if the addict continues down the path to destruction, you can know that you did your best. You sought professional help. You did that which the addict was incapable of doing. Seeking professional help and getting the addict into treatment is a strong, loving move. Being supportive of the treatment plan is the right thing to do. Being a source of love and emotional support is good. Calling an interventionist is a smart, proactive move.
Drug Addiction Family:
I just found out my son/daughter is taking drugs.
This is difficult. There is that sense of urgency and panic. Maybe you have discovered some pot in your child’s sock drawer, or perhaps they have displayed the signs and symptoms of drug use. Your inclination is to confront them and put a stop to it, but the likely outcome of that is going to be a huge argument and hurt feelings.
It is necessary to stop the drug abuse. It’s serious business, so we strongly encourage you to seek professional help.
Because your child is involved, there is an emotional attachment that all too often gets in the way of a practical solution to the problem. Take a deep breath and get some help. Pick up the phone and call groups like Alanon or Alateen for their guidance. These organizations will give you solid information, support and help you plan the best course of action.
If your child has been using, you may consider an intervention. Teens seldom admit that they have a problem, or even the potential for a problem, and therefore it is necessary to take steps to help. Their state of denial is strong. You need help to deal with that component of the problem. A drug interventionist will help you bring the problem into the open and formulate a strategy for helping your child.
Don’t be the Lone Ranger try to accurately access the impact of drug addiction family . Call for help. Contact groups, or the local drug addiction treatment center, or maybe even you physician. But don’t try to handle this on your own. The stakes are too high the impact to devastating.
For more drug addiction family link to our Symptoms page
Drug addiction family: addiction is a disease that impacts the ENTIRE family.
Drug addiction family: each family member should find help for themselves and Al-anon meetings are a great place to start.
Drug addiction family: third party treatment centers can help and are often necessary to get the addict to see that they have a problem that needs treatment.
Drug addiction family: don't enable your child who is addicted by covering for them or allowing them to get a "free ride" at your house.
Drug addiction family: sometimes the addict has to be totally cut-off from their family to see that they need treatment and that they do a have a problem. Usually the addict will be in denial until they hit bottom.
Drug addiction family: families can recover but the more spiritual support the family members can get the better off they will be.
To learn more about kids and addiction visit Teen Drug Abuse.
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and Finally Remember:
"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."
- Matthew 7:7-8
Karen Franklin and her daughter Laren King, authors' of “Addicted Like Me”, discuss their addiction and how Step 8 and 9 helped them to move past it, this week on Recovery Now!
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