Comments for At war…

by: Ned Wicker

Your parents’ reaction is not uncommon. Their complete lack of awareness, or their inability to see what is in front of them, or their not knowing what to do about it is sadly the case all too often.

“Kids will be kids” is nothing more than a statement of ignorance, perhaps uttered in hopes of the tooth fairy coming and removing your brother’s addiction.

Your father’s anger is typical, as men tend to react with anger rather than actually doing something constructive. He too has no clue.

Addiction knows no end. It will grip your brother by the throat and it will not let go until he is dead or until he allows himself to receive help.

The key for you is to understand that he must want the help, but that doesn’t mean you can’t influence his decisions. Because your brother is addicted, he naturally denies any problem.

Of course there is no problem. If I am trying to kill you why would I warn you about it? He is in denial. He can “handle it.” He had an overdose of heroin and that should tell your parents that he CAN’T handle it, no matter what he says.

Addiction is a family disease. You need to have a serious, adult conversation with your parents. You need to be calm. You need to be under control. You need to know that no matter what you say they may argue and fight with you.

They, like your brother, may be in complete denial about the situation. You need to go and get some help. As a university student, there are probably drug addiction counselors on your campus that can arm you with a plan for how to best be a help to your brother.

Your family doctor is another choice.

Al-Anon or other support organizations is another choice. But somehow you need to get your parents on the same page, and then collectively, you all approach your brother and get things started. You may need an intervention.

Addiction just doesn’t go away. Your brother is playing Russian Roulette with his life. Your parents can no longer enable your brother’s addiction. You need to get the process started. Sadly, if your parents don’t smarten up and if your brother refuses help, perhaps you can turn to law enforcement to help you.

I know this sounds strange, but sometimes people have to be protected from themselves. Doing illegal drugs is against the law, and so is abusing prescription drugs.

I have known of cases where the criminal justice system has saved lives by getting addicts into treatment, with the understanding that it’s either get clean or go to jail. That sounds harsh, but the alternative is worse.

There is hope. There is help in the community. You need to educate yourself, so get started.