Brother-in-law needs help!

I just found out for sure my brother-in-law is using drugs. None of the rest of the family knows.

I don’t know how to go about this. I don’t know if I should say something because I’m just married in to the family and don’t want to cause trouble?

I know everyone kind of suspects something is going on with him but they are my sure. Please help I don’t know what to do!!!

You Need a Plan

by: Ned Wicker

If you suspect something is wrong, you can do things to help. Your wife is a good place to start. Does she share your concerns? If she does, she is your catalyst to get the rest of the family together and get them on the same page.

If she will work with you, you can try to get the family into a meeting. But before you get too involved, it is always good for you and your wife to understand the battle before you.

Al-anon is an excellent organization for you to contact. Its members are people like you, family members, who want to help. They can give you guidance on what to do, how to do it and when to do it. There are books you can study, such as “Why Don’t They Just Quit?” by Joe Herzanek ( that explain what is going on and what you can expect.

So often people will confront the suspected addict and get a face full of abuse in return. The one with the problem will deny it, blame it on you, tell you they can handle it on their own, or maybe just get very angry and not talk to you anymore.

As a person slips into the addiction, they will shelter themselves from those who disapprove of their drug habit. Their “friends” will be those who use. They lose interest in professional goals, relationships and will abuse and manipulate their own family.

The disease robs them of their humanity and sense of responsibility. Understand that the addict will not necessarily go quietly into treatment.

You hopefully can see that you need a plan and everybody has to play their part. Addiction is a family disease, so like it or not, you are all a part of his addiction. You need to be strong, stand firm. You can do it.

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