Can my boyfriend stop using crack?
by Colleen
(Fort Lauderdale, FL)
My boyfriend of 3 years was the nicest most caring man I ever met. He opened doors, took me on cruises and was always the sweet gentleman every girl wished for.
He has an addictive personality and used weed for a year then he switched to cocaine. He now started using crack in the last year and stole everything I owned, abused and continuously lies.
He lost his job car and everything else he owned. He even stole my car and money to get drugs. Does he need rehab or is it too late?
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It can be Done
It is never too late if a person wants to receive help. The progression from marijuana to cocaine to crack cocaine is common. Left unchecked, it will lead to ruin. He needs treatment, so if you are going to be around and want to help him, you need to establish some rules, boundaries and limitations. What he has done to you, the lying and stealing, is typical behavior of an addict who wants only to get high, regardless of what he problem does to anyone else. I think you can see that as things stand you have no relationship. He loves crack, not you. The only way to get back that man you fell in love with is to get him into treatment. You can’t live with him, because he will rob you blind. You cannot have a close relationship with him, because his disease won’t allow it. You will never have a future with him unless he seeks treatment, completes it and gets into a solid recovery program. If he refuses help, you need to walk. You can be a friend and encourage him to get treatment, but as long as he has crack in his life there will be no room for you, no loving relationship and certainly no hope of a family. Give Al-anon a call and get with people who have a similar problem. Believe me, they understand and they can help. You are not going to turn this situation around on your own, you need a team and you have to be on the same page to get him to move forward. Get with his family and get them in on the process. If the man you love is in there someplace, maybe you can wait it out and see if he comes back. Otherwise, any decision you need to make for yourself will be made for you. |