Ex bf is a drug addict?

by Joelle


My ex bf and i broke up more than a year ago. The last time i saw him was 6 months ago when he passed by my work but i couldn’t talk that much. He just said that he misses me. But a week later his mom told me that he’s in the rehab, so i called him to check on him and so we continued to talk every 15 days.

Today he called me thanking me that I’m supporting him and that he will see me next week. He can go out to home for a day. I told him that i will always support him and that i love him so he said that he loves me to.

Do you think when he’s out he will be ready to be in a relationship?! or hes just taking me as a friend?

Be Careful

by: Ned Wicker

Dear Joelle,
I think you need to slow down and take a good, long look at your situation with your friend. The most important thing is for him to complete his treatment and get into a solid recovery program.

He needs to establish new lifestyle guidelines and not go back to his former life. Even with the best of intentions, that is not an overnight project, nor is it necessarily a straight line. His drug habit got him into trouble before and it can bite him again.

If you’re looking for an opinion, you need to decide what you want and set some standards that cannot be broken. One of those, naturally, would be that whomever you are with would not be a drug user.

If you desire to have a long-term relationship, you must give yourself the opportunity to select someone who is compatible with you, who shares your values and wants the same kind of things you want. Jumping into a relationship with your ex-boyfriend just because he says he’s OK now and wants to see you isn’t what I am talking about. He needs to prove himself worthy of you. Don’t think that you’re going to rescue him, because you’re not.

Don’t think you’re going to change him, because women who enter into relationships with that in mind are always disappointed. Your eyes have to be wide open.

He may tell you a lot of things. But he needs to back up his talk with action. Take it one step at a time and watch. If over time you are convinced that he is in good shape and has the capability of developing and sustaining a close, loving relationship with you, then and only then you can give it a try. There is no mystery here. Just be smart and set the bar high.

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