My friend is desperate

by Michael John


My friend who I have known for almost 30 years, recently lost his house, his wife is threatening divorce, and he cannot stop drinking, and the drinking has gotten progressively worse.

I myself have battled and overcame drug and alcohol dependency, but i have insurance. My friend..does not have any insurance or funds to get care.

What should I do? He is willing to go to a emergency room, but his concern is that with no insurance, they will turn him down.

He is extremely depressed, drinks all hours of the night and day, he has always been a beer drinker, but now he admits to buying and drinking cheap vodka “nips” at the rate of 5-10 a day to “kill his pain” as he says.

I have tried to talk to him, tell him that he has a wife who loves him and wants him back the way he used to be, and that is why she is so upset with him in his current state.

He has a 23 year old daughter, and a 21 year old son, and he doesn’t care about anything but numbing himself with whatever he can get his hands on cheaply.

He is my closest friend and I see him dying if he does not stop, and nothing I say has any lasting impression on him even though I have gone through drug and alcohol dependence myself.

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

His Problem

by: Ned Wicker

Dear Michael John,

So many people have been in your shoes, watching as a friend destroys his life and hurts those who love him. The disease has taken over and he no longer cares. He is incapable of making a good decision, and his problem has become everyone else’s problem.

Al-Anon is an excellent support group for those trying to figure out some answers to the difficult questions, like how do we get treatment for someone without insurance benefits.

Going to the emergency room may be necessary to treat alcohol poisoning, and if he goes they will treat him. There are free clinics, and alternative drug and alcohol treatment programs.

Start calling around and let Al-Anon help. Remember, he is going to have to deal with his problem and you are not going to save him. But you can get in the fight and try to help.


by: Mike

Wow, I don’t know what to say Debbie except ‘thank you” when I wrote I had no idea it would be published, but I am thrilled that it is out there because there are people who care and have some excellent ideas.

I want to thank you personally from the bottom of my heart, as it may not help Paul, but it sure helps ME knowing there are people who care not only for the addict/alcoholic, but also their friends ( myself ) that go through the worry and constant concern for my friends well being.

Like is he OK today? Is he drinking and driving? I

s he contemplating suicide again?

All these things are laid at the feet of US the people who the addict reaches out to, and although i myself beat heavy drinking and opiate pain medications ( also heavily addicted) i was able to overcome the percentages and beat it. I know i will always be an alcoholic/addict. And I know I don’t have all the answers, but when my friend calls me up crying, I am right there for him.

Which brings me to thanking you from the bottom of my heart for even the slightest nod from someone who knows what the support people endure themselves in helping an addict through the worst of times. You may use my correspondence anytime you like Debbie, you are a kindred spirit amd I can tell that you are an awesome person.

Although I am not a fire and brimstone religious person, I do believe in God, and i do pray every night and when I pray, I ask that God help me to help others, and to cleanse my soul so that i may walk the right path of freedom from addictions.

Please feel free to email me at anytime, I would love to contribute my personal stories which are straight from the bottom of the barrel of despair, depression, loneliness, hopelessness and all the feelings that go with addictions.
I believe that we are all put on this earth with a purpose in life, I believe mine is to convey the message that drugs, alcohol, are not “cool” they are a trick to make you lose your self-worthiness, which will ultimately lead to health problems, mental anguish, depression, and in a lot of cases suicide.

Thank you Debbie, your letter I am saving because when i read it I feel I am helping be it in a small way but if I can change the thought process of one teen, or one person on the edge, then I can feel complete in knowing there is something I can do to help those who are at their rock bottom but don’t know the way out.

I apologize if my letter is running long, it is a first for me, but the thing is it makes me feel worthy.

Thank you and please feel free to email me anytime, I am willing to help in any capacity

Sincerely Mike

Similar Posts