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Saving My Family.
by jen S
My husband of almost 13yrs and father to 3 beautiful girls, ages 12, 11, and 5yrs Has been a Meth addict for 4yrs.
I am so mad, so frustrated and so tired. I cry when I think about our family's future, my girls. Every time after our fights he acts like everything is normal, he tries to hide everything from seeing his "friends" and having money.
I've banned his "friends" from coming over because before they were hanging out at our home for hours everyday and until wee hours doing their Meth session, one of them is actually the dealer and he was dealing drugs at our home in the garage. I have never really researched what I was dealing with until few months ago when he spends almost all day in the garage with his "friends", I kept asking him to spend some time with us or at least with the girls.
From my research I found out that I am a codependent, I already have health issues but I started neglecting me and my kids to try to keep this family together. I have read somewhere to be not a codependent is to cut ties, BE STRONG.
During our recent fight I gave him 3 months to find a job to get on his feet or be told to move out. He got laid off work more than a year ago and is scared of doing the physical employers require because of the drug testing. he said why wait 3 months when he can leave now, which I said yes he can.
He's still at home. I still love him but I cannot take care of a person who will have psychological problems later on. One of his brothers already has it because of drugs.
I don't want my girls to see their dad slowly losing himself, and I want my girls to not lose respect for him. I want to see my girls to walk down the aisle with their dad.
I don't know what to do, I want to talk to him but he turns into Mr. Hyde when drug related issues comes up. Part of me wants him to leave and the other part wants to stay and help him get over his demon.
"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened." - Matthew 7:7-8