by: Ned Wicker

Dear Suzie,
Your son needs to get into treatment. His behavior tells me that his disease is well developed and if he doesn’t get help it is not just going to vanish. He is out of control and will destroy your family, because the disease doesn’t allow him to do anything but destroy himself and the people around him.

Don’t allow him to say no to treatment, and if he does, there is nothing you can do to help him. He will steal, run into law enforcement troubles, develop health problems and go nowhere. He will blame you for his problem, deny he has any responsibilities and just in case he hasn’t already done it, alienate every member of the family.

There is hope. Treatment can help him regain control, get his lie back on track and live a happy and productive life. However, addiction is a family disease and each member of the family needs help to learn how to deal with the situation and receive the emotional support they need.

Groups like Al-Anon do solid work in helping people live with addicts. So often we feel helpless and don’t know what to do, so these folks come along side and help us through.

You and other members of the family can only do so much. Sadly, your son has to make a choice to get better. He needs to take responsibility for what he has done to you, his family and to himself.

You can’t make that decision for him, but you can put pressure on him to make it. So, you do what it takes. Look at it this way, even a bad effort is better than no effort. You are not responsible for the results, but you are responsible to yourself to do as much as you can to help.

by: Suzie

I have read a lot and either you have to have insurance or be rich to go to treatment. Is there a place that actually will help? How long should someone be in treatment? Any response would be welcomed.

by: Debbie Wicker

Hi Suzy,

Yes there is usually free treatment available if you go to Al-anon meetings and get connected into your community they will help you find it. The Salvation Army may have a program in your area and there are also free treatment centers in large cities.

It is best however if your son pays what he can for the treatment(rather than buying drugs). Generally he will be MUCH more focused on recovery if he has some money invested otherwise he may just blow it off and not do the work necessary to stop using.

That’s why it’s so important that you get connected with Al-anon because many of the people there have gone through what you’re experiencing and can help you to find the right resources for your son and also help you to understand what actually needs to be done to help him quit.

At some point your son has to WANT to stop using and you may need to do an intervention to get him into to treatment.

I hope this helps:)

by: Anonymous

Heroin can be a real tricky drug to get over, it effects people socially and mentally so try not to blame yourself.

We have some great resource for heroin addiction issues that might help.