by Diane Bradford
(Chicago, IL, USA)
My name is Diane, and today I'm celebrating 3yrs and 6 months of clean time. I will be turning 56 years old come the 13th of this month. And out of 55 years of living I spent over 33 years of my life on drugs.
What started out as curiosity turned into the nightmare of my life. My drug of choice was heroin. It only took me 5 days before my whole world turned upside down. I work as a supervisor for over 12 years, and because of being sick, needing some heroin, I walked into my job and quit.
I even decided that I didn't want to be married anymore, because my husband couldn't make me feel as good as the drug made me feel. I dropped out of college.
By the time I had turned 28 I had accepted that this was how my life would be, that I would die while on drugs...One day my granddaughter came to me and said," grandma don't you get tried of being sick." She didn't know I was dope sick, she only knew that most of time I would be sick. But the day she asked me that question, was the day I wanted something better.
I prayed for God to help me and 3 days later I went to treatment, and have not used since...... For such a long time I thought I was trusting God, when all the while I was wanting Him to trust me.....
I'm so grateful today that I no longer have to look for the dope man, and that he is not looking for me. That I no longer have to reach under my bed, to get a plate of dope to get my day started.....Thanking my higher power everyday, that if I could spend over 33 years of my life turning it upside down, I will spend the rest of my life, turning it right side up....N.A. and A.A. keeps me mindful that its all about one day at a time......