Loving a heroin and crack addict
by Jeffrey Sklute
(Bethlehem, PA USA)
I have been in love with a crack and heroin addict for a few years. I've tried to get her to stop many times and it just always fails and I enable her.
About 9 months ago I couldn't take it anymore and attempted suicide. I was in the hospital and rehab for a few months and stopped all communication with her. I then suffered a heart attack and have been recovering ever since.
About four months ago I stated communicating with her by phone. She told me she was clean and I so wanted to believe. I started sending her money. We had been planning on getting a place to live and being together.
She always seems to have one story or another why things were bad and she needed money for this or that. I continued to help her, but became more and more suspicious. This past week I confirmed several of her stories were lies. She stopped calling for about four days. So I reached out to a supposed friend that I could call to see if she was ok.
The story from this person started to really get out there saying she was clean and backing all of my girlfriend's stories. We had only been texting and I felt it was really my girl using another phone. I asked her to call and she wouldn't.
Finally my girlfriend calls from her original phone and continues to lie even though I confront her with several of her stories being lies. She then continues texting me say how much she wants me and trying to seduce me. I keep responding to her asking her to be honest. She will not admit to her lies and keeps building on them. For the first time I held firm and would not send her any money even though she said she was going to overdose on pills.
It kills me that she does this. I love her so much and want to give her everything I have. But I feel like such a fool. I know she loves the drugs more than anything and I don't know how to help her. I am so depressed and I don't know how to go on myself. I miss her and am worried.
I'm sure she is dope sick and she will probably do anything to get her fix. It tears me up inside.
I know in a day or two I'll hear from her and she will be again for money even though she probably won't say it's for drugs. It seems worse this time since she is inventing people to lie. It's a sad life.
and Finally Remember:
"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."
- Matthew 7:7-8