Think fiance is an addict?

by Anne


I think my fiance has a addiction to alcohol an percs. 6 yrs ago he was diagnosed w/ fibromyalgia an his DR prescribed percs 5/325 then after a few yrs they were increased 2 7.5/325 then he was in a car wreak an were increased 2.

10/325 he said 4 a couple months he would take them an go back 2 7.5/325 cuz he doesn’t have ins. Pay out of pocket it has now been 5 months an still not going back 2 his regular script.

I think he is also a alcoholic if he doesn’t have his meds he says he needs alcohol 2 sleep an feel better I say he is addicted 2 them both he says no I’m not I have pain an need that stuff 2 help w/ everyday life. He says he can’t do things around the house cuz he hurts 2 much.

When he runs out of meds early he will call around 2 see if anyone has anything or knows where 2 get something I fear 4 him that one day he might get alcohol poison or overdose on percs.

I think these things are taking over his life an he doesn’t want 2 admit it. I would luv 2 help him but don’t know how 2. Please give me some advice.

Go With Your Instincts

by: Ned Wicker

Dear Anne,
If you are noticing all of this, chances are you are right on the mark. Your fiance is in denial and the combination of his prescription medication and the alcohol is not good.

You are stuck in a hard situation because you love him and you want to be supportive, but at the same time you know something is wrong. This is something that potentially will destroy your relationship. It’s already getting in the way.

His other medical issues aside, he needs to get help with his substance abuse. Do not underestimate this important fact—if he doesn’t get treatment, this will not get better on its own.

Maybe he’ll magically quit and never go back, but don’t count on it. He needs help to get off the drugs and he needs help with chronic pain management. Have you had an open and honest discussion about this? Does he deny a problem is possible? He may blame you for his difficulties, or even get angry.

But you need to bring this out into the open, because left unchecked his problem is going to make your marriage impossible to bear. It is possible that his disease will take over to the point where you don’t matter and there will be no room left for you.

His disease is also your disease. You need help and support too. Al-Anon is designed to help you deal with this situation. Give them a call.

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