CAN I HAVE MY CHILDHOOD BACK

 

CAN I HAVE MY CHILDHOOD BACK

by SYNETHIA L

(LAKEWOOD WA. USA)

I WAS TWO YEARS OLD WHEN IT ALL HAPPENED, SITTING IN A HIGH CHAIR WATCHING MY FATHER CUT MY HEAD BALD LIKE A BOY, BECAUSE HE WANTED HIS FIRST CHILD TO BE A BOY. NOT CARING HIS SECOND CHILD WAS A BOY, CRAZY!

MY MOM COULDN’T PROTECT US FROM HIM SHE WAS TO SCARED. MY FATHER BEAT ON US AND MY MOTHER, AND MY MOTHER LET IT HAPPEN NOT TRYING TO GO GET HELP INSTEAD SHE GAVE ME AWAY. MY MOTHER HATED MY GRANDMOTHER AND SHE HATED MY MOTHER, MY GRANDMOTHER GAVE MY MOTHER AWAY TO OTHER FAMILY MEMBER BECAUSE MY MOTHER TOLD HER MY GRANDFATHER RAPED HER. MY GRANDMOTHER DIDN’T BELIEVED HER SO SHE SENT HER TO LIVE IN WASHINGTON D.C WHEN SHE WAS LITTLE.

MY MOTHER WAS VERY ANGRY WITH HER, AT THE AGE OF TWO MY MOTHER DECIDED TO TAKE ME TO LIVE WITH THE WOMEN SHE HATED IN NEW YORK CITY. MY MOTHER DIDN’T EVEN CALL HER SHE JUST DROVE FOUR HOURS AND WALKED ME UP A FLIGHT OF STAIRS TO THE FOURTH FLOOR, KNOCKED ON A DOOR AND RAN AWAY. I LOOKED AROUND AND SHE WAS GONE I STARTED TO CRY AND RAN LOOKING FOR HER, CONFUSED NOT UNDERSTANDING WHAT WAS GOING ON, I THOUGHT I SAW HER GO THROUGH A DOOR BUT IT WAS NOT HER.

I CRIED AND CRIED AND THEN SOMEONE PICKED ME UP AND TOOK ME INSIDE A DOOR SAT ME DOWN AND BEGAN TO TELL ME TO SHUT UP STOP THAT CRYING. MY MOTHER JUST LEFT ME AT SOMEONE’S FRONT DOOR NOT EVEN CARING IF THEY WERE AT HOME OR LIVED THEIR NOT EVEN A GOODBYE. SOMEONE TOLD ME SHE RAN THROUGH SOMEONE’S DOOR AND OUT THE WINDOW.

I HATED HER FOR THAT FOR MANY YEARS, THEN THAT’S WHEN TROUBLE BEGAN, I LIVED IN HELL FOR EIGHTEEN YEARS WITH THE PEOPLE I CALL FAMILY MY CHILDHOOD WAS STOLEN FROM ME AND I WILL NEVER GET IT BACK.

FOR MANY YEARS I LIVED WITH THIS PAIN AND HEARTACHE, AND ALWAYS WONDER WHAT IT WOULD HAVE BEEN LIKE IF MY CHILDHOOD HAVE NEVER BEEN… STOLEN FROM ME?

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