I hate him!

by Bianca
(Adeliade, Australia )

I have never done this before but I need to talk to someone who can understand, so here it is my story.

My name is Bianca I am 15 years of age. My life was once so normal and loving, until one day I found out my dad was addicted to drugs. I had always known something was wrong with him, all the late nights and crazy mood swings. I have not seen him in the eyes I used to, I mean I used to like look up to him thought he would never hurt me.

He is a mean man I really really hate to say it but I hate him, I hate him so much for it, he is so selfish and never thinks of anyone for example my mum, he has hurt her emotionally and physically cheated on and lied to her over and over again. They're not together anymore but sometimes I see mum crying, she has a new man in her life and dad has a girlfriend (the one he had an affair with)

I can't stand him the worst part is he acts like everything is OK. He also has really bad lungs and has tried to kill himself. This has not just affected me, i have siblings, two sisters and a brother.

My older sister who is only 18 turning 19 really soon has moved out because of him, my brother is only 12 and is falling apart, he gets really badly bulled at school and can't read or write that well. My other sister never talks about is she is 17, she acts like everything is OK but I know she is in so much pain.

You see everyone acts like it is OK but it's not OK everything is such a mess. I go to school and I hate it there so much, I can't keep up with any of my work because I am so stressed and tired of everything in my life right now I really just want this to stop for everything to be OK.

I know my dad with never get help (trust me) and he has not got long to live, he just makes me so bad how he doesn't even take a moment to think of anyone but himself and his FXXXING DRUGS!

I don't know who will read this but if he responds do not tell me to tell him how I feel because here is a fun fact he will not (trust me i have tried) he only thinks about money and drugs.

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Your dad has hurt you very badly!
by: Debbie Wicker

Dear Bianca,

Dealing with your dad's addiction by yourself with everyone ignoring it or saying it is OK must be so difficult. What ever age a person is, watching their dad destroy himself and the entire family, with drugs, is devastating.

Most of us, can't deal with our family members addiction on our own, we need the support of others who are struggling with many of the same issues we are.

Please try to get your mom and your siblings to start attending Al-Anon meetings right away, and working the steps. They will help you to learn to love the addict but to HATE his addiction.

We often hate the addict (your dad), but it rips us up inside and is so harmful for us. Conversely, we can't live in denial and say everything is OK when it CLEARLY isn't. Our dad taking drugs and killing himself is certainly not OK.

Al-Anon teaches us how to deal with the problems and issues of addiction as proactively as possible and also helps us to connect with our higher power.

Listed below are some of the Al-Anon meetings I've found in Adeliade:

ADELAIDE CITY MONDAY, 12 noon, Al-Anon Office, 1st Floor, Harmer House, 5 Leigh Street

ADELAIDE CITY WEDNESDAY, 11.00am, Al-Anon Office, 1st Floor, Harmer House, 5 Leigh Street

ADELAIDE CITY THURSDAY, 12.00 noon, Al-Anon Office, 1st Floor, Harmer House, 5 Leigh Street

ADELAIDE CITY THURSDAY EVENING (gay), 5.30 to 6.30pm, Draper Room, Pilgrim Centre, Flinders Street, City (back of Pilgrim Uniting Church)

ADELAIDE CITY FRIDAY "Steps", 10.30am, Al-Anon Office, 1st Floor, Harmer House, 5 Leigh St

Please begin going to these meetings to get the support you need for yourself and your family!

Debbie

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