by: Debbie Wicker

Dear Kimberly,

Your concerns for your husband appear to be very well founded. Based on the limited information you’ve given me, it sounds like your husband has an addiction to alcohol and to opiates. Your assessment that your husband is slowly killing himself also sounds correct to me.

Because your husband is addicted, he is probably going to fight anything you try to do for him. He will say it’s no big deal and tell you to mind your own business. That’s the drug and alcohol talking not your husband.

Because alcohol and opiate addictions are diseases of the brain, they actually take over all of the addicts thought processes and literally turn them into a different person. They turn into a person willing to do ANYTHING to get the drugs they need.

Because addiction is a disease your husband needs treatment, which should include: detox, therapy, spiritual support and some kind of 12 step program. Detox from alcohol can be very dangerous, so it must be done in a medical facility of some kind.

He should start going to NA/AA meetings daily even though he is still using. 90 meetings in 90 days is a good start and he will begin to understand his addiction much better at these meetings.

You also need support to help find the best fit for the services your husband needs and also to learn how to take care of yourself as you move through this process with him. I strongly recommend you contact Al-anon in your local community and start attending meetings ASAP! Visit multiply meetings until you find one that you’re comfortable in and has members who help you get the information you need.

You also need to contact a doctor you can trust. Your husband’s doctor may or may not be a good choice. If you know your husband’s doctor and trust him, then you should confide in him/her and seek their support to get your husband into treatment. If you don’t know his doctor then find a new doctor not involved in this current situation and seek his/her support.

Finally, many churches have started a free support program for addiction called Celebrate Recovery. I would recommend both you and your husband, if possible, begin attending these groups.

Spiritual support during addiction recovery is absolutely ESSENTIAL for the recovery process to move forward. It will help BOTH of you to understand what your dealing with and learn how to overcome it. Addiction is a family disease and the entire family needs help and support to work through it.

This may seem like a long list but immediate action is critical to help your husband. He may be still working but addiction is a progressive disease and will likely get MUCH worse if he is not treated quickly.

Good Luck and may God Bless you and your husband,

Debbie Wicker

p.s. Don’t ignore the alcohol addiction it is often more difficult to treat and is just as serious.

by: kimberly Gray

Kimberly, thank you for sharing your situation. There will come answers to your pain. Debbie really addressed them with knowledge and help.

It’s hard too add to Debbie’s comment but I am so proud of you for reaching out, please keep doing so

regards,

Kimberly
(Toronto)
Recovering Addict.

by: Vern

Suboxone saved my life, I had the same problem.